Do the Thing You’ve Convinced Yourself You Can’t

I had been asked to deliver a keynote address at a leadership conference…

Not fully knowing what I was signing up for—I agreed to participate at the event.

This was in 2012, when I was just getting into speaking at events.

 I thought…“How bad could it be?” 

 Fast forward to the night before the event…I’m stuck in my head. I was an anxious wreck!

 I regretted even accepting the invite because I felt that I wasn’t qualified to speak on this platform.

“There’s going to be nearly 300 people there!”

“Why did I even say yes to this?”

“Nobody will be interested in anything that I have to say.”

“I’m going to completely embarrass myself!”

 These are thoughts that are running through my mind…I’m pacing the floor in my apartment wondering what I’ve gotten myself into.

 But in an instant…It all changed. 

 I calmed myself down by focusing on my breathing. My energy began to shift.

 I didn’t know it at the time, but we can use breathing to shift out of negative mindsets—Taking slow, measured breaths is an immediate way to relieve tension and anxiety and an invaluable tool for self-regulation of emotions.

 As I calmed myself down, I stopped thinking about what I felt I was lacking as a speaker and started focusing on the needs of the audience and how I would be in a position to provide value that they were searching for.

The next day, I stepped on stage, delivered my presentation, and was blown away by the response from the audience. There were dozens of people that spoke with me after the event to thank me for the insights that I shared.

 It was after this experience that I learned this lesson: You don’t have to believe everything you think.

The best way to battle your inner critic is to grow, to change, to show progress in your areas of struggle—To confront your doubts and fears head on.

This starts with you:

• Convincing yourself that you’re capable

• Being willing to go for it

• Remaining determined to find the method that works for you

What is it that you’ve convinced yourself that you can’t do?

Let this be the week that you decide to silence the echoes of doubt or the voice of fear by challenging them head on.

REMEMBER: There’s a special kind of strength that you develop when you do what you always thought you couldn’t.

WAYS TO TAKE ACTION:

1. Practice Thought Audits

At the end of each day, write down 2–3 negative or limiting thoughts that came up. Then challenge each one by asking:

• Is this actually true?

• What’s the evidence for and against this thought?

• What would I tell a friend who was thinking this?

The reason why this works:This trains your brain to recognize the difference between a thought and a fact. It also begins to separate your inner critic from your inner leader.

2. Commit to One “Challenging” Action this Week

Choose one thing this week that you’ve convinced yourself you “can’t do” (Sharing a bold idea, starting a fitness habit, taking on a leadership role, etc.). Break it down into one small action and do it—even if you make mistakes!

The reason why this works:This builds evidence of progress. Every time you act despite fear, you break down your old narrative and build new confidence.

3. Replace Doubt with Data

Start tracking progress in an area where you often feel self-doubt—Make note of simple data like:

• Number of attempts

• Feedback received

• Notable wins or lessons

The reason why this works:Facts are a powerful antidote to fear. Over time, you'll begin to see that you're more capable than the voice in your head suggests.

REMEMBER: Growth isn't about never hearing the inner critic—it’s about refusing to let that voice lead.

Let this be the week you choose to challenge your thoughts instead of obey them.